I totally forgot it was the fourth of July today until lunch, probably not good. Breakfast was late because it is strike day, so no work. We then had QT. Starting at 11 we got to ‘train’ some BSFB students. Train, basically means tell them what IV is like America and have them tell us what BSFB is like. We all had lunch together. This time was good for the boys but us girls didn’t really have anyone to talk to. For the most of the day there were only two girls, a girl that had a boyfriend and her friend. We got ice cream after and then played games and traded off worship songs.
After we showed them our IV leadership diagram and how to do a manuscript study, we had dinner, just the IV people, followed by playing Dutch blitz, which we tried to teach Milan (the cooks 12 year old son (or so he says), that could pass for 6). It was fun and exciting to see him learn. A lot happened today, but nothing was really life changing or seems important, just fun!
Friday, June 08, 2007
Bangladesh Journal: Monday July 3, 2006
Today was our first day at the blind school. Also all the other groups left for their sites. When we got to the school, no one greeted us. It turns out the principal wasn’t there, but the teachers could of at least said ‘hello’. Danielle got really frustrated. Rachel showed signs of being anxious. I couldn’t tell how Adriel felt. I was just confused about where to go and what to do; yet I was so excited to be there, in a school with children. It turns out that half the school is blind students while the other half are in Regular Ed.
I got to sit in on three classes, after we were assigned. First I was in class 4. There were 4 students, 1 boy and 3 girls. I was there to help with English lessons. I read them a poem and they were to recite it by reading it and then after memorized it. They looked to young compared to the 4th graders I know. I then wrote out English answers to workbook questions the students would be doing later, because the teacher did not have a teachers manual and she said her English is not that good. Then the bell rang and I went to the KG class (kindergarten) to help out with English. These kids are so bright! They can spell so many English words and English is not their first language. I don’t even know many kindergarteners who can spell half as many words. For instance, they spelled giraffe and hippopotamus. They can write it and verbally spell it. I was WOWed. From there, that teacher who was so sweet and amazing took me downstairs to a class 9 for blind students. They were learning about science. In order to prepare for their exams, the teacher would read a multiple-choice question and the choices and they would write them (in Braille) the questions and the answer. These girls have such great memories and were working so fast. How can anyone say that they are disabled? They are more capable than me in so many ways. Then the bell rang for break (play time).
Both Adriel and Rachel thought that this meant lunch and thus meaning time for us to leave but we had only been there for two and a half hours. I got to watch the kids run and play. I also got to attempt to teach them Simon says (didn’t work), but the song “head, shoulders, knees, and toes” was a hit. However before we could finish they ushered us away from everyone into the principles office for tea. No one was there. We had to drink tea alone. I thought that this was totally not like the Bangladeshi culture.
We decided to leave early, Danielle was not happy, Adriel was sick, and Rachel was worn out. No one really seemed to care that we left. We got back and really talked about our experience and talked about our expectations. We then went to lunch, which was followed by napping. Later that night Danielle’s group had a meeting. We were told that we would be moving sites to work with HEED and that Caleb ad Zach would be joining our group. I was ok with this but I knew I would miss the kids and our time as just girls. We talked about this and discusses that this is possibly the end of a season.
After dinner we met as two groups, who both stayed at Grace House. We met on the roof to debrief, give praise, and lift up prayers. This was good. We also prayed over Ray and Danielle who were exhausted and in need of wisdom. I can’t remember what we did after that but it was wither play cards or go to bed (As I am writing this I cam currently a little behind in my journal).
I got to sit in on three classes, after we were assigned. First I was in class 4. There were 4 students, 1 boy and 3 girls. I was there to help with English lessons. I read them a poem and they were to recite it by reading it and then after memorized it. They looked to young compared to the 4th graders I know. I then wrote out English answers to workbook questions the students would be doing later, because the teacher did not have a teachers manual and she said her English is not that good. Then the bell rang and I went to the KG class (kindergarten) to help out with English. These kids are so bright! They can spell so many English words and English is not their first language. I don’t even know many kindergarteners who can spell half as many words. For instance, they spelled giraffe and hippopotamus. They can write it and verbally spell it. I was WOWed. From there, that teacher who was so sweet and amazing took me downstairs to a class 9 for blind students. They were learning about science. In order to prepare for their exams, the teacher would read a multiple-choice question and the choices and they would write them (in Braille) the questions and the answer. These girls have such great memories and were working so fast. How can anyone say that they are disabled? They are more capable than me in so many ways. Then the bell rang for break (play time).
Both Adriel and Rachel thought that this meant lunch and thus meaning time for us to leave but we had only been there for two and a half hours. I got to watch the kids run and play. I also got to attempt to teach them Simon says (didn’t work), but the song “head, shoulders, knees, and toes” was a hit. However before we could finish they ushered us away from everyone into the principles office for tea. No one was there. We had to drink tea alone. I thought that this was totally not like the Bangladeshi culture.
We decided to leave early, Danielle was not happy, Adriel was sick, and Rachel was worn out. No one really seemed to care that we left. We got back and really talked about our experience and talked about our expectations. We then went to lunch, which was followed by napping. Later that night Danielle’s group had a meeting. We were told that we would be moving sites to work with HEED and that Caleb ad Zach would be joining our group. I was ok with this but I knew I would miss the kids and our time as just girls. We talked about this and discusses that this is possibly the end of a season.
After dinner we met as two groups, who both stayed at Grace House. We met on the roof to debrief, give praise, and lift up prayers. This was good. We also prayed over Ray and Danielle who were exhausted and in need of wisdom. I can’t remember what we did after that but it was wither play cards or go to bed (As I am writing this I cam currently a little behind in my journal).
Bangladesh Journal: Sunday July 2, 2006
Well today is Opposition Day, meaning there is protesting and riots all over the city. This means for us that we cannot leave Grace House, which might be a good thing because it is so hot. This also means that almost no one drives because the Police and RAB (Rapid Action Battalion) are out in massive force. So after breakfast this morning, Beth and I looked from the roof to the street and for once there is no honking, empty streets and barely any people walking about. The dance floor has cleared for a brief time.
Due to this we have had a lot of time for site prep, which starts tomorrow. We opened our group time with prayer. Today I was more focused or tried to be, but I had woken up with a headache. It was really good to pray before diving into some things. From there we did a group devotional led by Zach. This was cool and fun. It was great to hear people’s opinions on Bible stories from the Old Testament and their thoughts on Mark 6: 1-6. It’s amazing to see how much faith people have had in God, yet how little those that had known Jesus growing up had faith in His power and authority. I fear that coming home might be like this. That they may not believe in that change that has happened to me and the gifts God has blessed me with, simply because they know who I use to be.
After devotional we started ESL (English as a Second Language) training. Sarah got to lead it since that is her major. The activities they planned were fun. We then had lunch, which was followed by more ESL training. We then were told to read our Bangladesh packet that was filled with info. I discovered that WILLIAM CAREY started the first Non-Catholic church here, thus leading me to think of and miss Carey.
We broke up into groups of two, so I guess pairs to present a portion of the information. I was with Beth and we covered the Dos and Don’ts. Lauren and Adriel wrote a song for their info. I thought it was awesome. Then we wrote a ‘testimony’ or rather a response for people who ask ‘Why are you here?’ This all took a really long time.
Then we got back together with our site leaders; they had been having meetings and preparing for tomorrow pretty much all day. Our group prayed for Danielle; she has a heavy heart and she broke a tooth on a piece of pita bread; that’s talent. It was weird because all day, if I saw Danielle leave a room suddenly or look saddened or whatever, I just automatically assumed it was about a baby and I have no idea why. I think I’m going to share this with here at some point.
We then went to dinner. Afterwards, we had a whole trek meeting. Marie shared about people’s sarcasm really hurting her. Some people apologized, which was good. It was then time to head to our rooms. I saw Sarah looking sad. So I went to talk to her and cheer her up. We talked and laughed a ton. I whipped out my man voice for her. She has decided to call that persona Biff. But it made her happy and that was awesome. It was also great to get to know her better. We also started a quote wall, which I love. Then we all went to ‘bed’. Lauren, Rachel, and myself talked until 12:30.
Due to this we have had a lot of time for site prep, which starts tomorrow. We opened our group time with prayer. Today I was more focused or tried to be, but I had woken up with a headache. It was really good to pray before diving into some things. From there we did a group devotional led by Zach. This was cool and fun. It was great to hear people’s opinions on Bible stories from the Old Testament and their thoughts on Mark 6: 1-6. It’s amazing to see how much faith people have had in God, yet how little those that had known Jesus growing up had faith in His power and authority. I fear that coming home might be like this. That they may not believe in that change that has happened to me and the gifts God has blessed me with, simply because they know who I use to be.
After devotional we started ESL (English as a Second Language) training. Sarah got to lead it since that is her major. The activities they planned were fun. We then had lunch, which was followed by more ESL training. We then were told to read our Bangladesh packet that was filled with info. I discovered that WILLIAM CAREY started the first Non-Catholic church here, thus leading me to think of and miss Carey.
We broke up into groups of two, so I guess pairs to present a portion of the information. I was with Beth and we covered the Dos and Don’ts. Lauren and Adriel wrote a song for their info. I thought it was awesome. Then we wrote a ‘testimony’ or rather a response for people who ask ‘Why are you here?’ This all took a really long time.
Then we got back together with our site leaders; they had been having meetings and preparing for tomorrow pretty much all day. Our group prayed for Danielle; she has a heavy heart and she broke a tooth on a piece of pita bread; that’s talent. It was weird because all day, if I saw Danielle leave a room suddenly or look saddened or whatever, I just automatically assumed it was about a baby and I have no idea why. I think I’m going to share this with here at some point.
We then went to dinner. Afterwards, we had a whole trek meeting. Marie shared about people’s sarcasm really hurting her. Some people apologized, which was good. It was then time to head to our rooms. I saw Sarah looking sad. So I went to talk to her and cheer her up. We talked and laughed a ton. I whipped out my man voice for her. She has decided to call that persona Biff. But it made her happy and that was awesome. It was also great to get to know her better. We also started a quote wall, which I love. Then we all went to ‘bed’. Lauren, Rachel, and myself talked until 12:30.
Thursday, June 07, 2007
Bangladesh Journal: Saturday July 1, 2006
Well it’s Canada Day and Lauren is totally going all out. She made flags, copies of the anthem (English and French) and decorated the breakfast room. She started to do this when she was waiting to use the phone, but the Internet was down, we were using an Internet phone. I helped sing the Anthem at breakfast, Lauren also had people read Psalm 72; this is where Canada gets its motto. It was awesome to do this.
We also decided to make the Sabbath on Saturday because work starts on Sunday here (Fridays is the Islamic holy day). So there was NOTHING planned except for meals, finally a time to relax. So breakfast was an hour later and we had a lot of free time. I slept for like and hour and a half. Then Lauren and myself played cards with Kyle, Dan, Zach, and Caleb. We played Oh Nuts!, and 6 handed euchre. It was like being at home and playing with friends and family. More of what I needed.
Then there was lunch and then more cards. We (the group and myself) went out and bough lungies (meaning the boys did) and pop (Coke AND Pepsi). Followed by more cards. The time flew by; it was a great way to relax, and to get to know the guys better.
At times it was like being with my cousins (the joking), but still very different. It’s also interesting to see how Caleb is already starting to change. On Friday night Lauren and I called some of his behavior to his attention and he has already started to make changes. Also the guys called me out on my competitiveness. I can be a sore loser and a not perfect winner.
So as the day was going by I made sure to watch my attitude and when I was feeling upset I would turn to God and look to see why I was feeling the way I was feeling. He has found the most interesting places to meet with me and begin to change me. We had dinner followed by a time of group prayer. I knew that after prayer I would be able to call home (IT WAS WORKING). So I was a tad impatient during prayer and God called me out on this. I do need to work on being patient especially being focused on the task at hand, in this case prayer and lifting things up to Christ.
I still did get to talk to my parents. YAY praise God. It was awesome to hear their voices. I was able to tell them I was feeling better. But it made me realize more so that I do miss them. It was encouraging to have them tell me they are so prod of me and that they and so many others are praying for me and the rest of the group.
After the phone call, I heard people singing ‘Oh Canada”. I found that the leaders had gotten a cake for Canada Day so that Lauren would feel a little at home. It was awesome. Asian Cakes are so different then our cakes; the frosting wasn’t really sweet it was more like butter. I think go to watch the end of the football game. IT was England vs. Portugal. England lost (Beckham and another awesome player were out, oh so I am told). It’s always crazy to see how much the rest of the world loves football. The world cup is huge; every building has a different team flag on it (mostly Brazil and Argentina, who are both out now). It was close to 12:45 am when I finally got to go to bed and crash.
We also decided to make the Sabbath on Saturday because work starts on Sunday here (Fridays is the Islamic holy day). So there was NOTHING planned except for meals, finally a time to relax. So breakfast was an hour later and we had a lot of free time. I slept for like and hour and a half. Then Lauren and myself played cards with Kyle, Dan, Zach, and Caleb. We played Oh Nuts!, and 6 handed euchre. It was like being at home and playing with friends and family. More of what I needed.
Then there was lunch and then more cards. We (the group and myself) went out and bough lungies (meaning the boys did) and pop (Coke AND Pepsi). Followed by more cards. The time flew by; it was a great way to relax, and to get to know the guys better.
At times it was like being with my cousins (the joking), but still very different. It’s also interesting to see how Caleb is already starting to change. On Friday night Lauren and I called some of his behavior to his attention and he has already started to make changes. Also the guys called me out on my competitiveness. I can be a sore loser and a not perfect winner.
So as the day was going by I made sure to watch my attitude and when I was feeling upset I would turn to God and look to see why I was feeling the way I was feeling. He has found the most interesting places to meet with me and begin to change me. We had dinner followed by a time of group prayer. I knew that after prayer I would be able to call home (IT WAS WORKING). So I was a tad impatient during prayer and God called me out on this. I do need to work on being patient especially being focused on the task at hand, in this case prayer and lifting things up to Christ.
I still did get to talk to my parents. YAY praise God. It was awesome to hear their voices. I was able to tell them I was feeling better. But it made me realize more so that I do miss them. It was encouraging to have them tell me they are so prod of me and that they and so many others are praying for me and the rest of the group.
After the phone call, I heard people singing ‘Oh Canada”. I found that the leaders had gotten a cake for Canada Day so that Lauren would feel a little at home. It was awesome. Asian Cakes are so different then our cakes; the frosting wasn’t really sweet it was more like butter. I think go to watch the end of the football game. IT was England vs. Portugal. England lost (Beckham and another awesome player were out, oh so I am told). It’s always crazy to see how much the rest of the world loves football. The world cup is huge; every building has a different team flag on it (mostly Brazil and Argentina, who are both out now). It was close to 12:45 am when I finally got to go to bed and crash.
Bangladesh Journal: Friday June 30, 2006
Well in Bangladesh the weekend starts on Friday. We got to go to church. It was cool to go to church in another country; I was surprised the whole service was in English. They said they were going to play some new songs and they were songs that I have sung before. It was amazing to see how strong their passion for God and worshipping Him is. The youth led worship, so it will be interesting to see how worship is different next week.
We got free time for a lot of the day. I played cards, talked and just hung-out, which was much needed. When us girls were talking, we realized how weird of a place this is for gender roles to come up. Then we got to have Bible study with the BSFB persons. Andrew got to talk about Heaven. For most of the time following I had no idea what was being said. But it was cool to hear passionate prayers in another language. The group also prayed for us. It was cool that they all prayed in Bengali (except Peter). We had no idea what they were saying, but that is like prayer from him, both are good prayers to God for you even though you don’t know what is being said.
Then we all went upstairs for tea and sweetbread. I talked with a few BSFB people but mostly Jotti, Nohemiah, and Elias. They are the staff who have been helping us. Then we had a somewhat late dinner. Then I got to do my first load of laundry (YAY), all hand washed. Then I went to bed.
Oh I totally forgot, before laundry but after dinner a bunch of us sat around and talked about boy and girl relations and how they view certain things (this is what I mean by gender roles). Then we played cards until 1 am. This was so much fun but a bad idea because we could call home starting at 7am, but that’s life!
We got free time for a lot of the day. I played cards, talked and just hung-out, which was much needed. When us girls were talking, we realized how weird of a place this is for gender roles to come up. Then we got to have Bible study with the BSFB persons. Andrew got to talk about Heaven. For most of the time following I had no idea what was being said. But it was cool to hear passionate prayers in another language. The group also prayed for us. It was cool that they all prayed in Bengali (except Peter). We had no idea what they were saying, but that is like prayer from him, both are good prayers to God for you even though you don’t know what is being said.
Then we all went upstairs for tea and sweetbread. I talked with a few BSFB people but mostly Jotti, Nohemiah, and Elias. They are the staff who have been helping us. Then we had a somewhat late dinner. Then I got to do my first load of laundry (YAY), all hand washed. Then I went to bed.
Oh I totally forgot, before laundry but after dinner a bunch of us sat around and talked about boy and girl relations and how they view certain things (this is what I mean by gender roles). Then we played cards until 1 am. This was so much fun but a bad idea because we could call home starting at 7am, but that’s life!
Bangladesh Journal: Thursday June 29, 2006
Today started out rough. I felt really sick to my stomach, but I went to breakfast in hopes of settling it. That didn’t happen. I threw up. So I stayed in bed until lunch. Everyone else, but Rachel, ran errands and took rickshaws around town. Rachel and I played one set of cards, slept, I puked one other time, and she had traveler’s diarrhea. But we talked a lot which was good.
After lunch we went to HEED (Heather Education Economics Development) of Bangladesh. The whole time I heard this guy talk, I thought about how my Dad could make a partnership with them and his idea for a Missional Corp. They were really nice and fed us snacks and gave us chai tea. Then we came back.
We had Internet access, so we took turns. While we waited I played cards with people. I learned Sarah’s game of ‘Oh Nuts!” and I won. We also played Kinds Cornered, which was fun. Then we ran out of time for the Internet because we had dinner. Everyone before had 25-30 minutes; the people after dinner only had 10 minutes. That kind of really sucked. I was kind of mad. It had been such a hard sucky day that I could have cried and I expressed this in an email (maybe a bad idea).
Then after I was done with the Internet I went to get my cards. I heard people laughing and I went to see what was up. Beth, Lauren, Andrew, Nohemiah, and Elias (BSFB staff) were talking and joking. God knew I needed laughter and community so He provided it. We laughed so hard. Elias (who I now call Charlie) was trying to eat but couldn’t. After laughing so hard we went to bed. I then got to talk to Adriel and Sarah with Lauren. That was more community that I needed. Praise God who provides all things.
After lunch we went to HEED (Heather Education Economics Development) of Bangladesh. The whole time I heard this guy talk, I thought about how my Dad could make a partnership with them and his idea for a Missional Corp. They were really nice and fed us snacks and gave us chai tea. Then we came back.
We had Internet access, so we took turns. While we waited I played cards with people. I learned Sarah’s game of ‘Oh Nuts!” and I won. We also played Kinds Cornered, which was fun. Then we ran out of time for the Internet because we had dinner. Everyone before had 25-30 minutes; the people after dinner only had 10 minutes. That kind of really sucked. I was kind of mad. It had been such a hard sucky day that I could have cried and I expressed this in an email (maybe a bad idea).
Then after I was done with the Internet I went to get my cards. I heard people laughing and I went to see what was up. Beth, Lauren, Andrew, Nohemiah, and Elias (BSFB staff) were talking and joking. God knew I needed laughter and community so He provided it. We laughed so hard. Elias (who I now call Charlie) was trying to eat but couldn’t. After laughing so hard we went to bed. I then got to talk to Adriel and Sarah with Lauren. That was more community that I needed. Praise God who provides all things.
Bangladesh Journal: Wednesday June 28, 2006
I woke up this morning to the sound of Lauren’s alarm (5:15am). She didn’t hear it. After this morning, I really feel like I could be very easy to get unto a set comfortable schedule, which is not what this trip is suppose to be about. I do not want to be comfortable to the point where I could slip into easy ways or comfortable ways of acting. Breakfast was good. So was QT. I have become more comfortable with the girls and my body. Since it is so hot we walk around in the bare minimum of necessary clothing. Not that I ever hated my body or felt big, but after yesterday it was good to feel like my body is OK and to be comfortable in what would make me feel temperature cool.
Then we had a time of worship. We began that time by praying for the staff so many of them are so worn out. They are not getting QTs, they have meeting instead. I can’t imagine how draining that must be. Then we went into a time of songs and scripture being read aloud. God has truly gifted Adriel with a heart for worship that honors HIM. Everything worked together like the “dance of Bangladesh”. That phrase Sarah said as we were driving through traffic from the airport. She said it all was a dance. Then when she went out into the streets she was excited to be part of the dance. It is truly beautiful to think about. And like a dance there are parts that are faster or slower, and quiet or loud. Also every once in a while someone missteps and there is something off, but the dance keeps going
After worship we did language lessons. Like usual I may pick up at first but I have a problem retaining it. So I will need to practice. From there we broke up into 4 groups to do observation in three places and prayer. I got to go down the streets, through the mall, and up on the roof. I felt more comfortable walking down the streets and through the mall. I felt like I could walk with my head at its normal height, they said keeping your head down draws more attention. I also look around where I am walking, but still my line of vision never lingering and never making eye contact. The groups rotated so I got to go everywhere and pray. I, however, was not comfortable on the roof. There were men working on the roof of the factory, a couple building down, who stopped working to stare at our group. I don’t know why, curious or for other reasons, but I could not just walk by like in the streets. I became very uncomfortable. Also there was a smell of garbage from on top of a different building that I could not escape. The smell reminded me of when my mom worked at United Airlines and there was a dumpster by the loading docks, which we had to go by sometimes when she would drop off uniforms or take things form her office. It’s weird to smell something that was once so familiar so far away from home.
We then had lunch. The rice and chicken were absolutely amazing, but due to being so hot I didn’t want to eat a lot. We then had more language lessons. At times I know what the BSFB staff wanted to say in English or communicate to us, so I help along and he/she is glad for that, but I feel like I am once again translating for Hilary before she decided to talk. I need to just soak it in more before I’ll be comfortable saying anything.
After this we had free time. I journaled and then played cards with Sarah, Lauren, and Megan. I learned how to play Dutch blitz. After that a couple of us went shopping for our outfits; I had only found one the day before. This was another NOT fun experience. I actually hit my breaking point and began to in the store. Some girls who were wearing the same size as me were able to find clothes, but when I went to try them on, the shoulders were too tight, the back was too tight, or something like that. It just sucked. It is really funny how I can go through this roller coaster of emotions. Also it was dark out so I was frustrated about that. There are no streetlights so you can’t really see anything as you walk from one store to the next.
Well what made the night a little better was dinner. It was really good, and we had some ice cream. Oh I needed and wanted that. We then had a speaker (Rana). I guess he is going to come and speak every week. He was really good, outgoing, and interesting to listen to, yet I didn’t understand everything he had to day. He is blunt and doesn’t beat around the bush, which is also good. He told a story that I didn’t understand at first. “In the woods there was a jackal who was crippled. There was also a tiger that had to kill his dinner every night. The tiger would eat his food and then throw the scraps to the crippled jackal. One day a healthy jackal sat by the crippled jackal. The tiger say this and ate the jackal.” Rana never said which jackal the tiger ate but I will have to think and pray about what this story means. After that I crashed really hard and went to sleep quickly.
Then we had a time of worship. We began that time by praying for the staff so many of them are so worn out. They are not getting QTs, they have meeting instead. I can’t imagine how draining that must be. Then we went into a time of songs and scripture being read aloud. God has truly gifted Adriel with a heart for worship that honors HIM. Everything worked together like the “dance of Bangladesh”. That phrase Sarah said as we were driving through traffic from the airport. She said it all was a dance. Then when she went out into the streets she was excited to be part of the dance. It is truly beautiful to think about. And like a dance there are parts that are faster or slower, and quiet or loud. Also every once in a while someone missteps and there is something off, but the dance keeps going
After worship we did language lessons. Like usual I may pick up at first but I have a problem retaining it. So I will need to practice. From there we broke up into 4 groups to do observation in three places and prayer. I got to go down the streets, through the mall, and up on the roof. I felt more comfortable walking down the streets and through the mall. I felt like I could walk with my head at its normal height, they said keeping your head down draws more attention. I also look around where I am walking, but still my line of vision never lingering and never making eye contact. The groups rotated so I got to go everywhere and pray. I, however, was not comfortable on the roof. There were men working on the roof of the factory, a couple building down, who stopped working to stare at our group. I don’t know why, curious or for other reasons, but I could not just walk by like in the streets. I became very uncomfortable. Also there was a smell of garbage from on top of a different building that I could not escape. The smell reminded me of when my mom worked at United Airlines and there was a dumpster by the loading docks, which we had to go by sometimes when she would drop off uniforms or take things form her office. It’s weird to smell something that was once so familiar so far away from home.
We then had lunch. The rice and chicken were absolutely amazing, but due to being so hot I didn’t want to eat a lot. We then had more language lessons. At times I know what the BSFB staff wanted to say in English or communicate to us, so I help along and he/she is glad for that, but I feel like I am once again translating for Hilary before she decided to talk. I need to just soak it in more before I’ll be comfortable saying anything.
After this we had free time. I journaled and then played cards with Sarah, Lauren, and Megan. I learned how to play Dutch blitz. After that a couple of us went shopping for our outfits; I had only found one the day before. This was another NOT fun experience. I actually hit my breaking point and began to in the store. Some girls who were wearing the same size as me were able to find clothes, but when I went to try them on, the shoulders were too tight, the back was too tight, or something like that. It just sucked. It is really funny how I can go through this roller coaster of emotions. Also it was dark out so I was frustrated about that. There are no streetlights so you can’t really see anything as you walk from one store to the next.
Well what made the night a little better was dinner. It was really good, and we had some ice cream. Oh I needed and wanted that. We then had a speaker (Rana). I guess he is going to come and speak every week. He was really good, outgoing, and interesting to listen to, yet I didn’t understand everything he had to day. He is blunt and doesn’t beat around the bush, which is also good. He told a story that I didn’t understand at first. “In the woods there was a jackal who was crippled. There was also a tiger that had to kill his dinner every night. The tiger would eat his food and then throw the scraps to the crippled jackal. One day a healthy jackal sat by the crippled jackal. The tiger say this and ate the jackal.” Rana never said which jackal the tiger ate but I will have to think and pray about what this story means. After that I crashed really hard and went to sleep quickly.
Bangldesh Journal: Tuesday June 27, 2006
I had a good night sleep last night, kind of warm but the fans kept the breeze going. Rachel left me a pleasant message last night or maybe this morning. I was able to take a shower, a.k.a. a showerhead from the ceiling where the toilet also is, and then journal from 7am until 9:30 am. I think I’m still on Manila time.
We had breakfast, toast and eggs. Then we had worship. After going through the airport with my head down and being stared at, I really wanted to worship, as a group, so that I could refocus on Christ and praise Him in keeping me safe. We then went into an extended quiet time. I needed the time to not be busy and just sit with the Lord, read His word, and mediate on them. We also received our prayer partner assignments for the week. I have Rachel. I really feel God calling me to minister to her and maybe help guide her in His will for her. Yet at the same time it’s hard to do that because I want to be ministered to and nurtured because I can feel so tired and like I have given too much. But I should and have to trust in the Lord’s ways and will.
During QT (quiet time), I did the ‘required’ devotional and then talked about prayer requests with Rachel. I wish there had been more time to do some meditation. Then we had lunch. I felt embarrassed, foolish, dumb, and filled with confusion. During lunch I sat across form the BSFB (Bangladesh InterVarsity) staff. At one point Lauren and I filled our water bottles with cold water from the table and I guess this was wrong because they started talking to each other and the guy who works at the Grace House. It was also weird that we were the only two girls sitting by them because we were not sure how much we were suppose t talk to them, or if we were not suppose to start the conversation, because they are men. But I believe they were being gracious to us for they gave us more cold water.
We then went into male and female separate debriefing time. This was food because it gave us time to talk and process what had been going on so far. I really thought about how I was feeling when I was walking through the airport. I felt like a white woman. I was aware for the first time that I was white. I have always known it but I have never been so aware of it. Also I could feel every man’s eyes that was staring at me. I didn’t know if they were just curious or if they were thinking something else. I heard people laughing who were standing by us. I scanned across the area, making sure not to make eye contact (which would be flirting), and there were a few people pointing. I felt not like a proud independent woman, but like a show or amusement to be stared at. These were some things we talked about.
From there we went to hearing about Bengali culture from Peter who runs Grace House. We also heard the testimonies from the BSFB workers. I’m still trying to learn their names. We were told then that we would be going shopping. I was in a group with Dan, Zach, Beth, Lauren, and a staff worker (Jotti).
This time was so frustrating and not because of the male/female roles or because of staring, but because many places did not have my size. A few times I asked if they had size 44 (or rather Jotti did for me) and I got an “OH NO” or a chuckle.
(The following part has been added in retrospect.) I am not a girl who has a problem with the way my body is but it was just hard to be so highly criticized by so many people in one day. The women of Bangladesh are generally tiny and I was just bigger than them. (End of retrospect.)
It was nice to talk to some shopkeepers; most of them practiced their English on us. We also stayed out too late. I did not enjoy walking through the streets in the dark. This made me feel unsafe, especially when the rest of the group walked a bit faster than me. But we made it back safe. We then had dinner. I was for sure more comfortable then.
Afterwards, I got to talk to Ling. Here and I see and believe a lot of things in a similar light. We are considered to be liberal and conservative all at the same time. It was so refreshing to talk about something that is comfortable for me to talk about with another person. Also this was a time to get to know Ling better. We joked about with Darren too, which was so much fun. I then came back to the room and attempted to crash. I was woken up by Rachel, Bath, and Lauren talking. Rachel had just gotten back from talking with Ray and Danielle. She needs prayer and guidance so that’s what I will give her. Then I did finally get to sleep.
We had breakfast, toast and eggs. Then we had worship. After going through the airport with my head down and being stared at, I really wanted to worship, as a group, so that I could refocus on Christ and praise Him in keeping me safe. We then went into an extended quiet time. I needed the time to not be busy and just sit with the Lord, read His word, and mediate on them. We also received our prayer partner assignments for the week. I have Rachel. I really feel God calling me to minister to her and maybe help guide her in His will for her. Yet at the same time it’s hard to do that because I want to be ministered to and nurtured because I can feel so tired and like I have given too much. But I should and have to trust in the Lord’s ways and will.
During QT (quiet time), I did the ‘required’ devotional and then talked about prayer requests with Rachel. I wish there had been more time to do some meditation. Then we had lunch. I felt embarrassed, foolish, dumb, and filled with confusion. During lunch I sat across form the BSFB (Bangladesh InterVarsity) staff. At one point Lauren and I filled our water bottles with cold water from the table and I guess this was wrong because they started talking to each other and the guy who works at the Grace House. It was also weird that we were the only two girls sitting by them because we were not sure how much we were suppose t talk to them, or if we were not suppose to start the conversation, because they are men. But I believe they were being gracious to us for they gave us more cold water.
We then went into male and female separate debriefing time. This was food because it gave us time to talk and process what had been going on so far. I really thought about how I was feeling when I was walking through the airport. I felt like a white woman. I was aware for the first time that I was white. I have always known it but I have never been so aware of it. Also I could feel every man’s eyes that was staring at me. I didn’t know if they were just curious or if they were thinking something else. I heard people laughing who were standing by us. I scanned across the area, making sure not to make eye contact (which would be flirting), and there were a few people pointing. I felt not like a proud independent woman, but like a show or amusement to be stared at. These were some things we talked about.
From there we went to hearing about Bengali culture from Peter who runs Grace House. We also heard the testimonies from the BSFB workers. I’m still trying to learn their names. We were told then that we would be going shopping. I was in a group with Dan, Zach, Beth, Lauren, and a staff worker (Jotti).
This time was so frustrating and not because of the male/female roles or because of staring, but because many places did not have my size. A few times I asked if they had size 44 (or rather Jotti did for me) and I got an “OH NO” or a chuckle.
(The following part has been added in retrospect.) I am not a girl who has a problem with the way my body is but it was just hard to be so highly criticized by so many people in one day. The women of Bangladesh are generally tiny and I was just bigger than them. (End of retrospect.)
It was nice to talk to some shopkeepers; most of them practiced their English on us. We also stayed out too late. I did not enjoy walking through the streets in the dark. This made me feel unsafe, especially when the rest of the group walked a bit faster than me. But we made it back safe. We then had dinner. I was for sure more comfortable then.
Afterwards, I got to talk to Ling. Here and I see and believe a lot of things in a similar light. We are considered to be liberal and conservative all at the same time. It was so refreshing to talk about something that is comfortable for me to talk about with another person. Also this was a time to get to know Ling better. We joked about with Darren too, which was so much fun. I then came back to the room and attempted to crash. I was woken up by Rachel, Bath, and Lauren talking. Rachel had just gotten back from talking with Ray and Danielle. She needs prayer and guidance so that’s what I will give her. Then I did finally get to sleep.
Bangladesh Journal: Monday June 26, 2006
Well it has been a week since I have been home. This morning I got a rather rude awakening. I put my feet down on the group and there was an inch and a half of water. Last night a pipe burst and there was flooding. Everything, but Marie’s bags, was wet. I had, luckily or rather by God’s grace, put my backpack and purse on top of my big bad and had most of my things in plastic bags. But I still had to send my red bag to get dried. We had a rush to save what was dry, by the way I was the first to get up and I told the girls who all jumped out of bed. After I got everything tat was we, including my bag to the drier and after I bagged everything that had not been in a hefty bad, I got to the shower and kind of got ready. Our floor was so gross, no one can believe.
We then had a quick breakfast. During this time I didn’t want to eat because I was frustrated, wet, and a million other things, but I was shown some great community. Even though there was food right in the next room, Sean offered me food. That is exactly what I needed this morning. I needed someone willing to give of him/herself for me, and God knew that and He used Sean. Praise God, who meets all needs.
So then we loaded up the bus and headed for the airport. It was crazy to see Manila again when I was more awake. There are three lanes but they act as if there are four. I saw slums by waterways, under bridges, next to anything. They looked as if they were not real but out of a magazine or commercial. At one point, I saw a couple of houses that were by a dump truck. I wondered if they had picked that place because the dump truck parked there (access to trash). We finally got to the airport, unloaded the bus and then entered the airport. We then waited about an hour before checking in because Danielle’s laptop was not found. We finally found out it was on the bus, which was back at the house we had been staying at which was an hour away. So she had to leave t there.
We checked n, ate our bag lunches and then began our trip through security. Manila’s security is tighter than anything I have ever experiences. For instance, you have to show your ticket and passport to get in the airport. Then you have to do the same after you check in. You then pay a tax, which was $10.50 US or 550 pesos. Then you walk through a terminal towards your gate. When you hit the next checkpoint you things go through x-ray machines and you walk through a metal detector, which you already did when you got to the airport. Finally everyone has to go through a pat down. It took pretty much everything in me to not laugh when she felt my butt with both hands. Then there is another ticket check in so that you wan sit in the waiting area…WOW!
We then boarded the flight going to Singapore. I got to sit next to Phil on the plane. We flew Singapore Airlines. By far the best flight EVER! We could pick our own movie and the seats had TVs in the headrests. The rows always had just 3 seats and were rather large.
Phil and I sat by a woman who is from India. She travels a lot. It was cool to talk to hear. I then watched Sabrina the remake. I had watched the original before I left and had wanted to watch the remake, but ran out of time. We had great food too. When we made it to Singapore, I was amazed. It was so beautiful, from the plane. I loved it. There were ships everywhere. It looked so clean and small. The airport matched. There was a huge mall. Sarah and I wondered around. We sent emails from the free Internet hub, only 15 minutes allowed. We got a bit of a rip off. I guess there is a place where you can call home at 8 cents a minutes, but we got phone cards for 20 cents a minute. But that is life. It was great to talk to my family. They told me I sounded great. It was my Mom’s first day at work so they were up at 6am. Oh it was just great to talk to them.
Then we went to the gate. We had to go through an x-ray machine and metal detector to get to our waiting area. They thought my toys for the kids were weapons. They saw that they had clearly made a mistake. From that point on I had to take on a submissive persona. There were Bengali men there. We then loaded the plane, which was really empty. I got to sit by Lauren and Kyle. We watched the movie 8 below. Once again TVs in the headrests and my pick of movies, but this time you could not stop and rewind. We then played hearts, which I royally sucked at.
We finally arrived in Bangladesh at 11pm. The guys were good at walking with and around us women at all times. We went through customs, which was a little nerve racking because I couldn’t understand the customs officers and I could not look him in the eye. And they had turned away Rachel because she didn’t have an address of where we were going to stay. But we all got through. We picked up our bags. We had been praying about going through the final security check where they can tax you for what you bring in. We were worried because we were bringing in sound equipment as a gift; Ray was worried it would be taxed or taken away. The Holy Spirit was with us; we were told to walk right through, NO x-ray, NO questions, NO anything.
When we got outside we saw Peter, who was waiting for us. He runs the Grace House. He was happy to see us. We then walked to where he had parked. This got a little scary, because it was dark and there were a lot of staring men. Us girls kept our heads down and stayed pretty quiet. We finally got all of our bags loaded and all of us loaded into the cars. At this point a guy tried to get money from us by saying that he had helped us, he hadn’t and saying we owe him, which would bring shame to us. We then shut the door and left. It was bad that us women were out at night it is simply not done. The guys sat by every door and the girls in the middle and back, no door access. No one could see us, which was good.
Then I had the craziest ride of my life. There were 3-lane traffic but 4 rows of cars plus people walking and motorcycles swerving through. They use horns non-stop and drive on the left side of the road. I was amazed. We then made it to Grace House. It is a small building in bade but it is 5 stories tall. I am staying on the 3rd floor in a room with Rachel, Beth, Lauren, Adriel, and Sarah (Adriel and Sarah are in a connecting room). We opened the room in prayer. This was a blessing because I wanted to pray for Hilary, she has a roommate situation at camp and my mom and for the girls.
Oh I just remembered that when I saw Dhaka (the capital) from the plane it was amazing! I could see the lights and the cars moving. I prayed for the city them.
We then had a special prayer for Hilary, after I shared what I was told. We headed upstairs for a late night snack, which they had prepared for us. It was good, but I was not hungry. We also got to go on the rooftop and see the city. There is a factory next door; people were working at 12:30 at night. I’m hoping it is not a sweatshop and that they are either 2nd or 3rd shift workers. It would be nicer to work at night though, not as hot and no sun.
We then went to bed. There is a contest going on, who can kill the most cockroaches. It started in Manila. At this point, the score is Sean and Caleb each have 1, me with 4 and Ray with 8. After last night Sarah has 1 and I have 9! I got to go to bed, but not before Lauren screamed because one flew into her hair, these bugs can fly. I might not have to use my mosquito net, they have some here, plus mine needs to be hung from the ceiling and I can because of the two ceiling fans. I might let someone use it or just not use it at all. It is good to be where I will be staying for 5 weeks. Praise God we made it safe to the other side of the world.
We then had a quick breakfast. During this time I didn’t want to eat because I was frustrated, wet, and a million other things, but I was shown some great community. Even though there was food right in the next room, Sean offered me food. That is exactly what I needed this morning. I needed someone willing to give of him/herself for me, and God knew that and He used Sean. Praise God, who meets all needs.
So then we loaded up the bus and headed for the airport. It was crazy to see Manila again when I was more awake. There are three lanes but they act as if there are four. I saw slums by waterways, under bridges, next to anything. They looked as if they were not real but out of a magazine or commercial. At one point, I saw a couple of houses that were by a dump truck. I wondered if they had picked that place because the dump truck parked there (access to trash). We finally got to the airport, unloaded the bus and then entered the airport. We then waited about an hour before checking in because Danielle’s laptop was not found. We finally found out it was on the bus, which was back at the house we had been staying at which was an hour away. So she had to leave t there.
We checked n, ate our bag lunches and then began our trip through security. Manila’s security is tighter than anything I have ever experiences. For instance, you have to show your ticket and passport to get in the airport. Then you have to do the same after you check in. You then pay a tax, which was $10.50 US or 550 pesos. Then you walk through a terminal towards your gate. When you hit the next checkpoint you things go through x-ray machines and you walk through a metal detector, which you already did when you got to the airport. Finally everyone has to go through a pat down. It took pretty much everything in me to not laugh when she felt my butt with both hands. Then there is another ticket check in so that you wan sit in the waiting area…WOW!
We then boarded the flight going to Singapore. I got to sit next to Phil on the plane. We flew Singapore Airlines. By far the best flight EVER! We could pick our own movie and the seats had TVs in the headrests. The rows always had just 3 seats and were rather large.
Phil and I sat by a woman who is from India. She travels a lot. It was cool to talk to hear. I then watched Sabrina the remake. I had watched the original before I left and had wanted to watch the remake, but ran out of time. We had great food too. When we made it to Singapore, I was amazed. It was so beautiful, from the plane. I loved it. There were ships everywhere. It looked so clean and small. The airport matched. There was a huge mall. Sarah and I wondered around. We sent emails from the free Internet hub, only 15 minutes allowed. We got a bit of a rip off. I guess there is a place where you can call home at 8 cents a minutes, but we got phone cards for 20 cents a minute. But that is life. It was great to talk to my family. They told me I sounded great. It was my Mom’s first day at work so they were up at 6am. Oh it was just great to talk to them.
Then we went to the gate. We had to go through an x-ray machine and metal detector to get to our waiting area. They thought my toys for the kids were weapons. They saw that they had clearly made a mistake. From that point on I had to take on a submissive persona. There were Bengali men there. We then loaded the plane, which was really empty. I got to sit by Lauren and Kyle. We watched the movie 8 below. Once again TVs in the headrests and my pick of movies, but this time you could not stop and rewind. We then played hearts, which I royally sucked at.
We finally arrived in Bangladesh at 11pm. The guys were good at walking with and around us women at all times. We went through customs, which was a little nerve racking because I couldn’t understand the customs officers and I could not look him in the eye. And they had turned away Rachel because she didn’t have an address of where we were going to stay. But we all got through. We picked up our bags. We had been praying about going through the final security check where they can tax you for what you bring in. We were worried because we were bringing in sound equipment as a gift; Ray was worried it would be taxed or taken away. The Holy Spirit was with us; we were told to walk right through, NO x-ray, NO questions, NO anything.
When we got outside we saw Peter, who was waiting for us. He runs the Grace House. He was happy to see us. We then walked to where he had parked. This got a little scary, because it was dark and there were a lot of staring men. Us girls kept our heads down and stayed pretty quiet. We finally got all of our bags loaded and all of us loaded into the cars. At this point a guy tried to get money from us by saying that he had helped us, he hadn’t and saying we owe him, which would bring shame to us. We then shut the door and left. It was bad that us women were out at night it is simply not done. The guys sat by every door and the girls in the middle and back, no door access. No one could see us, which was good.
Then I had the craziest ride of my life. There were 3-lane traffic but 4 rows of cars plus people walking and motorcycles swerving through. They use horns non-stop and drive on the left side of the road. I was amazed. We then made it to Grace House. It is a small building in bade but it is 5 stories tall. I am staying on the 3rd floor in a room with Rachel, Beth, Lauren, Adriel, and Sarah (Adriel and Sarah are in a connecting room). We opened the room in prayer. This was a blessing because I wanted to pray for Hilary, she has a roommate situation at camp and my mom and for the girls.
Oh I just remembered that when I saw Dhaka (the capital) from the plane it was amazing! I could see the lights and the cars moving. I prayed for the city them.
We then had a special prayer for Hilary, after I shared what I was told. We headed upstairs for a late night snack, which they had prepared for us. It was good, but I was not hungry. We also got to go on the rooftop and see the city. There is a factory next door; people were working at 12:30 at night. I’m hoping it is not a sweatshop and that they are either 2nd or 3rd shift workers. It would be nicer to work at night though, not as hot and no sun.
We then went to bed. There is a contest going on, who can kill the most cockroaches. It started in Manila. At this point, the score is Sean and Caleb each have 1, me with 4 and Ray with 8. After last night Sarah has 1 and I have 9! I got to go to bed, but not before Lauren screamed because one flew into her hair, these bugs can fly. I might not have to use my mosquito net, they have some here, plus mine needs to be hung from the ceiling and I can because of the two ceiling fans. I might let someone use it or just not use it at all. It is good to be where I will be staying for 5 weeks. Praise God we made it safe to the other side of the world.
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Bangladesh Journal: Sunday June 25, 2006
Well today is my last day in Manila, or rather my last full day. I can’t believe how much time has gone by, yet I feel as though god has already done so much. I woke up this morning with a little shred of my headache, but it is the Sabbath, our day of rest. We are going to honor the Sabbath in as Biblical way as possible. I did this at Cedar Campus and I like it and I am going to pray about when God wants me to observe His day of rest, when I get home. We were allowed to sleep in, YAY! Then we had a time of worship. We were told that we would be having a retreat of silence from about 9:45 pr 10am until 1pm. I love ROS (retreat of silence). I have experienced how god can really use them. And He hasn’t let me down this time. I really saw Him in His word. Also it was so great to process from the day before.
After ROS we went into group time, and then we broke up into site teams. I am really growing in love for my group. I also feel as though God wants to use me in Rachel’s life this summer and to build a bond that last when we get back; she does to school 45 minutes from me. We shared a little about ourselves, Danielle and myself. Through my story of Doug, Danielle gave me a challenge, to rebuild trust in all men when they mess up, because that will happen, they are human. After that we made a covenant. Oh and we wrote down prayer requests and areas we have learned. I was surprised what God brought to my attention.
From there we had free time…in the rain. A bunch of us went swimming. We played Marco Polo, sharks and minnows, colors, and we made up blind numbers. We then got ready for dinner. After dinner, we had a commissioning service. This was AMAZING. We prayed for our leaders, each other, for our trek, for everything, and for everyone. When I was being commissioned God gave Ray a picture of God and me dancing for Joy. I will hold onto this image tightly. I think God wants me to rejoice in Him and with Him always and that is what I think that image means.
From there we prayed with each other. But before that we prayed for students who don’t have support from their earthly parents. Leaders prayed for them and then they sat down. During the time when students were getting prayed for, God gave me His words for Rachel. I can’t even remember what I said but they were in part what she needed to hear. Then God gave me words of comfort and affirmation for a girl sitting to my right who I have NEVER talked to and didn’t even know her name. I am so amazed how God never ceases! I also prayed for Sarah. I feel so blessed that God has given me a heart for prayer. After the service, we went back to our rooms and packed for leaving on Monday. Then we of course talked and Marie prayed a goodnight prayer. We all feel asleep rather quickly.
After ROS we went into group time, and then we broke up into site teams. I am really growing in love for my group. I also feel as though God wants to use me in Rachel’s life this summer and to build a bond that last when we get back; she does to school 45 minutes from me. We shared a little about ourselves, Danielle and myself. Through my story of Doug, Danielle gave me a challenge, to rebuild trust in all men when they mess up, because that will happen, they are human. After that we made a covenant. Oh and we wrote down prayer requests and areas we have learned. I was surprised what God brought to my attention.
From there we had free time…in the rain. A bunch of us went swimming. We played Marco Polo, sharks and minnows, colors, and we made up blind numbers. We then got ready for dinner. After dinner, we had a commissioning service. This was AMAZING. We prayed for our leaders, each other, for our trek, for everything, and for everyone. When I was being commissioned God gave Ray a picture of God and me dancing for Joy. I will hold onto this image tightly. I think God wants me to rejoice in Him and with Him always and that is what I think that image means.
From there we prayed with each other. But before that we prayed for students who don’t have support from their earthly parents. Leaders prayed for them and then they sat down. During the time when students were getting prayed for, God gave me His words for Rachel. I can’t even remember what I said but they were in part what she needed to hear. Then God gave me words of comfort and affirmation for a girl sitting to my right who I have NEVER talked to and didn’t even know her name. I am so amazed how God never ceases! I also prayed for Sarah. I feel so blessed that God has given me a heart for prayer. After the service, we went back to our rooms and packed for leaving on Monday. Then we of course talked and Marie prayed a goodnight prayer. We all feel asleep rather quickly.
Bangladesh Journal: Saturday June 24, 2006
When I woke up, I said to Beth, “Today is going to be a LONG day,” having really no idea that this was an insight from God. We had a great time or worship. Darren and Ling led. We did a song called “Sweetly Broken”. During this song I asked God to break my heart and how he wanted to break it. We then went into quiet time and later a speaker (Father Ben). I loved him. He has been the best speaker so far. He is from Smokey Mountain, which is famous for being a burning garbage mountain in Manila. His vision is infectious; he said that he was sorry for inflicting us with it. He said that this will be a journey of solitude, a journey to help find out who we are, and a quest of spirituality. He really spoke to my heart when he talked of the Holy Spirits’ guidance and leading being better than being organized and prepared. This is because our God is a God of surprises. Father Ben was bursting with wisdom and humor; at one point he quoted Backstreet Boys (“show me the meaning of being lonely.”)
Relating to my entry from yesterday, he said, “We are not called to be successful but to be faithful!” God doesn’t desire for me to wind but rather for me to follow him recklessly and with all that I am. There are so many amazing notes in my trek journal from his talk that it would take forever to write them down. But I would like to write one quote that really hit me. “If I do not belong to a community, whose feet shall I wash?” I was like WOW! I can’t always be an individual. I need armor bearers, I need helpers, and I need people to walk with me! This was kind of huge but God still hadn’t answered my prayer.
So we had lunch and then prepared for a ‘race’ activity. Also we were preparing for walking to a different place. It was amazing to be outside of the compound. Everyone would stop and stare at us. This has never happened to me before. The streets were busy with motorcycles that had a passenger cart attached. There were trucks that were filled with men (most of the trucks said “Not 4 Hire.”) There was half of a sidewalk often being blocked by something. The whole time we were talking it was raining. The rain felt cool because the air was hot and sticky. We finally reached where we were going, a covered multi-purpose room. There were kids playing basketball at a hoop just outside in the street. This did not seem at all safe to me.
The ‘race’ activity started with every member starting shoulder to shoulder. Then we were asked a series of questions. Depending on our response we could take a step either forward or backwards. The questions were about family, finances, education, ethnicity, media, work, safety, and etc. Depending on where we landed is where we were allowed to start the ‘race’ for candy. By the end of the questions, I was up by the front. My ethnicity is portrayed in a more positive light in the media. If I need to, I could pay for an apartment, I could make that work. My Dad does have his masters and PhD. My parents both graduated from high school. I technically do not have to work to pay for school, I have parents to support me and I have student loans. I have so many things other do not. When ‘go’ was said I half walked, half ran to the finish line without thinking. I had my pick of candy, bit others did not. There were women of non-white ethnicity up against the wall in the back of the multi-purpose room. They were crying. I didn’t know how to respond. We then had a time of debriefing. These sisters in Christ were hurt and feeling all the pain they had fought to pass by and forget. They saw the men of non-white ethnicity only getting so far and the white men and women passing everyone by. Some comments they had filled me with anger. For instance, when one girl said “our parents never had to work as had as hers did”. I thought my parents have sacrifices a lot for me to go to the school I wanted. Also I was mad that there was never a question in the ‘race’ about debt for I would have then had to take a few steps back. My family makes things work.
I wrote a lot of questions of wonder, anger, and curiosity in my trek journal. At the end of one page, I wrote, “Lord, I surrender all of these things to you!” And I did. I prayed to see his children as he did. This was all at debriefing at the compound. God told me to “Weep with my children as I weep with them. Mourn as I mourn for their pain. My heard is broken for them and their pain, so yours should be too.” Then God broke my heart for His children who have been hurt, oppressed, prejudice against, who cry, weep, fight for a right, who have no where in the world to turn but Him. I began to weep uncontrollably. God’s heart and my heart were aligned. I rejoiced in my heard and mind for the Lord s good and faithful to all prayers. He had answered my prayer and I continued to weep for and with His children.
We had a time of sharing after this time of processing. After a few people, I got up and told what the Lord had done. I thanked them for sharing. I apologized for not being an advocate, for not stopping every joke or comment that may be tearing people of non-white ethnicity down when they are not there. For being tired of fighting for God’s children. I thanked them for giving me a window of what my little cousins could face if the world does not change. My heart wept or Max, Vincent, and Eric. I had grown to not see differences in skin color and the pain they could feel. I had never talked with my Uncle Rick about what he has gone through being a black man. I never talked to Gespar about his fight staying in the USA. My anger was washed away, there is no need for anger, just grace, mercy, and love. I had heard Jesus weep that day and I wept along side His children. I cried till I thought I had no more tears but more tears came. We finally finished the time of sharing. There were apologies from the white community, men as a gender, from people who had been filled with hate due to what people had done to them or people of their same ethnicity. It was a blessing for my heart to be broken.
I missed dinner that night because I had cried so hard I had a headache. This God turned into a blessing. Marie was willing to share with me about her hurt and I prayed over her. Lauren shared in her feelings of guilt and pain and we prayed for her, when I say we I mean Beth, Marie, Lauren, and myself. Then Beth shared in her hurt, pain, and anger towards men. We prayed over her. For each of these women God had led me to pray for them in a specific way and to lay my hands on them in a certain place. For Marie, I was called to lay my hands on her back for her burden. For Lauren, I placed my hands on her head for her confusion of thoughts. While I was praying for Lauren before Beth shared, God gave me a picture of hands on her heart, so when we prayed for her that’s what I did, for that’s where she is hurt. Then they went to dinner and I laid down. Adriel came to see if I needed anything, so I prayed for her. Danielle came to see what I needed. It was great to feel cared for by this new community. I talked with Danielle about how she was doing. I was so happy that she was willing to share with me. She was also able to minister and relate to the pain that Beth felt; Beth had come back from dinner. I then prayed for Danielle and the Holy Spirit was there for the words that I said were words that her and ray had been praying about that I could not have any knowledge of. Some where in this whole evening of prayer Lauren said that she could see that I have a gift of discerning. This was such a blessing to me for I had been praying for this for my chapter of InterVarsity this whole year.
After we prayed, it was time for worship and the nighttime activity, which was seeing how we approach conflict. I’m a compromiser. My commission was to be more accommodating and at times willing to collaborate. We then went into team time. We shared about what god has been doing and is doing. This was awesome. I felt exhausted through. It was great and recharging to see how God is building us as a community. After this Danielle requested individual group time, her, Rachel, Adriel, and myself. This time was so great for we came together as a community and ministered to Rachel and each other. This time was also recharging, yet when I left I asked Beth to pray and then crashed.
Relating to my entry from yesterday, he said, “We are not called to be successful but to be faithful!” God doesn’t desire for me to wind but rather for me to follow him recklessly and with all that I am. There are so many amazing notes in my trek journal from his talk that it would take forever to write them down. But I would like to write one quote that really hit me. “If I do not belong to a community, whose feet shall I wash?” I was like WOW! I can’t always be an individual. I need armor bearers, I need helpers, and I need people to walk with me! This was kind of huge but God still hadn’t answered my prayer.
So we had lunch and then prepared for a ‘race’ activity. Also we were preparing for walking to a different place. It was amazing to be outside of the compound. Everyone would stop and stare at us. This has never happened to me before. The streets were busy with motorcycles that had a passenger cart attached. There were trucks that were filled with men (most of the trucks said “Not 4 Hire.”) There was half of a sidewalk often being blocked by something. The whole time we were talking it was raining. The rain felt cool because the air was hot and sticky. We finally reached where we were going, a covered multi-purpose room. There were kids playing basketball at a hoop just outside in the street. This did not seem at all safe to me.
The ‘race’ activity started with every member starting shoulder to shoulder. Then we were asked a series of questions. Depending on our response we could take a step either forward or backwards. The questions were about family, finances, education, ethnicity, media, work, safety, and etc. Depending on where we landed is where we were allowed to start the ‘race’ for candy. By the end of the questions, I was up by the front. My ethnicity is portrayed in a more positive light in the media. If I need to, I could pay for an apartment, I could make that work. My Dad does have his masters and PhD. My parents both graduated from high school. I technically do not have to work to pay for school, I have parents to support me and I have student loans. I have so many things other do not. When ‘go’ was said I half walked, half ran to the finish line without thinking. I had my pick of candy, bit others did not. There were women of non-white ethnicity up against the wall in the back of the multi-purpose room. They were crying. I didn’t know how to respond. We then had a time of debriefing. These sisters in Christ were hurt and feeling all the pain they had fought to pass by and forget. They saw the men of non-white ethnicity only getting so far and the white men and women passing everyone by. Some comments they had filled me with anger. For instance, when one girl said “our parents never had to work as had as hers did”. I thought my parents have sacrifices a lot for me to go to the school I wanted. Also I was mad that there was never a question in the ‘race’ about debt for I would have then had to take a few steps back. My family makes things work.
I wrote a lot of questions of wonder, anger, and curiosity in my trek journal. At the end of one page, I wrote, “Lord, I surrender all of these things to you!” And I did. I prayed to see his children as he did. This was all at debriefing at the compound. God told me to “Weep with my children as I weep with them. Mourn as I mourn for their pain. My heard is broken for them and their pain, so yours should be too.” Then God broke my heart for His children who have been hurt, oppressed, prejudice against, who cry, weep, fight for a right, who have no where in the world to turn but Him. I began to weep uncontrollably. God’s heart and my heart were aligned. I rejoiced in my heard and mind for the Lord s good and faithful to all prayers. He had answered my prayer and I continued to weep for and with His children.
We had a time of sharing after this time of processing. After a few people, I got up and told what the Lord had done. I thanked them for sharing. I apologized for not being an advocate, for not stopping every joke or comment that may be tearing people of non-white ethnicity down when they are not there. For being tired of fighting for God’s children. I thanked them for giving me a window of what my little cousins could face if the world does not change. My heart wept or Max, Vincent, and Eric. I had grown to not see differences in skin color and the pain they could feel. I had never talked with my Uncle Rick about what he has gone through being a black man. I never talked to Gespar about his fight staying in the USA. My anger was washed away, there is no need for anger, just grace, mercy, and love. I had heard Jesus weep that day and I wept along side His children. I cried till I thought I had no more tears but more tears came. We finally finished the time of sharing. There were apologies from the white community, men as a gender, from people who had been filled with hate due to what people had done to them or people of their same ethnicity. It was a blessing for my heart to be broken.
I missed dinner that night because I had cried so hard I had a headache. This God turned into a blessing. Marie was willing to share with me about her hurt and I prayed over her. Lauren shared in her feelings of guilt and pain and we prayed for her, when I say we I mean Beth, Marie, Lauren, and myself. Then Beth shared in her hurt, pain, and anger towards men. We prayed over her. For each of these women God had led me to pray for them in a specific way and to lay my hands on them in a certain place. For Marie, I was called to lay my hands on her back for her burden. For Lauren, I placed my hands on her head for her confusion of thoughts. While I was praying for Lauren before Beth shared, God gave me a picture of hands on her heart, so when we prayed for her that’s what I did, for that’s where she is hurt. Then they went to dinner and I laid down. Adriel came to see if I needed anything, so I prayed for her. Danielle came to see what I needed. It was great to feel cared for by this new community. I talked with Danielle about how she was doing. I was so happy that she was willing to share with me. She was also able to minister and relate to the pain that Beth felt; Beth had come back from dinner. I then prayed for Danielle and the Holy Spirit was there for the words that I said were words that her and ray had been praying about that I could not have any knowledge of. Some where in this whole evening of prayer Lauren said that she could see that I have a gift of discerning. This was such a blessing to me for I had been praying for this for my chapter of InterVarsity this whole year.
After we prayed, it was time for worship and the nighttime activity, which was seeing how we approach conflict. I’m a compromiser. My commission was to be more accommodating and at times willing to collaborate. We then went into team time. We shared about what god has been doing and is doing. This was awesome. I felt exhausted through. It was great and recharging to see how God is building us as a community. After this Danielle requested individual group time, her, Rachel, Adriel, and myself. This time was so great for we came together as a community and ministered to Rachel and each other. This time was also recharging, yet when I left I asked Beth to pray and then crashed.
Bangladesh Journal: Friday June 23, 2006
Last night we had another potty party. This time at 4:45 am and Beth joined in. I got up at 5:50 am to shower and get ready. I also worked on my journal. I am all caught up not and am really excited to write down my feelings when they happen.
Today we did a few different activities to learn about diversity. For one activity part of a group went into hiding and then the other people decided a task for the person to do and then we could only communicate how to do the task by clapping. The first time we had one person, Andrew, who had to take a chair from the patio and put it in the circle and I just remembered I can’t write about this…sorry.
We then did another activity where we made two different societies and then we visited the other community. I can’t talk about this either. At times, I felt really frustrated because I wasn’t able to communicate with other people. Also I found the group dynamic distressing. Going back to my thought about the guy and girl dynamics in Bangladesh, I feel frustrated that I wont be able to start conversations with men and I cant make eye contact. Also I do not know how I will handle walking behind the men and things like that. I am worried that his might be my pushing point. But I will have to trust the Lord and what he wants to show me through this.
Oh yeah, we had a speaker today as well. She is actually published in a book we have to read Quest for Hope in the Urban Slums. It was really good to hear from her for she talked about the aspects of poverty. I felt tired and fought to stay awake but I really wanted to listen. But I did take notes, and I will reflect on them later. I am talking with the girls, Adriel, Beth, and Lauren, during our unexpected break after our two activities. I also found out that Lauren and Beth will be staying at Grace House with us. So YAY!
Tonight we are having a non-optional fast. We gathered to pray and Ray said we were having a feast and he revealed nothing. After, Ray spoke and then we had a time of prayer and reflection. I for the first time had a tiny glimpse as to what it means to be hungry NOT by choice. They don’t have a choice. Lord please continue to give me revelation about Your kingdom, Your poor communities, and Your will. Lord give me Your heart, eyes, and ears to connect and bond with Your people. I know that the only reason for hunger and poverty is because of sin. The speaker later said, “The hungry do not die because God did not care for them but because neither you or I gave them anything to eat.” I was left with WOW! Nut I still want to know why I have been blessed while others live in poverty and hunger? Lord help me to see and understand Your vision. I was left with these words the speaker said, “The poor are or desert.” I know I still have to process this a lot more.
Looking back on the activities from today, I know that I need to be gracious towards all people dealing with miscommunication and I need to be brave and bold. I should not fear being made a fool or stepping out in new ways. I should never just stand there and/or retreat to my comfort zone. I should and need to be bold because I have the Lord. Also today I really feel called to encouraged (by God and Sean) to be intentional with my relationship with Marie. I think it will be so easy for her to crawl inside herself and be an introvert. Also I want to encourage Sarah more and grow closer to her. We both have had little interaction with one another. I feel as though she can be discouraged and may feel on the outskirts at times. I feel overjoyed that the Lord has put these thoughts and desires in me and I have a desire to respond and I WILL!
On a more surface level, I killed my first cockroach. I think only 2 or 3 of us have done this. There is a contest for who can kill the most. I really want to talk to Phil about spiritual gifts; we started this talk back in April when I drove him home. I’m really amazed right now as we all journal before group time how we all have such a passion for God and his people in each of our own ways. I also can see that we each show it very differently at time and at other times similarly. God is good like that. “I’m in awe.”
I might loose this summer, loose according to me. I might be called to get my competitive side in check. God brought this to my thoughts when we had group time. We reflected and we prayed. This was a time to talk and apologize for thoughts, actions, and words. It was good to do this so that we were able to get things and thought off our chests and out of our minds. After words we went to bed. Adriel prayed for us. Yet NONE of us went to bed. We talked until about midnight.
Today we did a few different activities to learn about diversity. For one activity part of a group went into hiding and then the other people decided a task for the person to do and then we could only communicate how to do the task by clapping. The first time we had one person, Andrew, who had to take a chair from the patio and put it in the circle and I just remembered I can’t write about this…sorry.
We then did another activity where we made two different societies and then we visited the other community. I can’t talk about this either. At times, I felt really frustrated because I wasn’t able to communicate with other people. Also I found the group dynamic distressing. Going back to my thought about the guy and girl dynamics in Bangladesh, I feel frustrated that I wont be able to start conversations with men and I cant make eye contact. Also I do not know how I will handle walking behind the men and things like that. I am worried that his might be my pushing point. But I will have to trust the Lord and what he wants to show me through this.
Oh yeah, we had a speaker today as well. She is actually published in a book we have to read Quest for Hope in the Urban Slums. It was really good to hear from her for she talked about the aspects of poverty. I felt tired and fought to stay awake but I really wanted to listen. But I did take notes, and I will reflect on them later. I am talking with the girls, Adriel, Beth, and Lauren, during our unexpected break after our two activities. I also found out that Lauren and Beth will be staying at Grace House with us. So YAY!
Tonight we are having a non-optional fast. We gathered to pray and Ray said we were having a feast and he revealed nothing. After, Ray spoke and then we had a time of prayer and reflection. I for the first time had a tiny glimpse as to what it means to be hungry NOT by choice. They don’t have a choice. Lord please continue to give me revelation about Your kingdom, Your poor communities, and Your will. Lord give me Your heart, eyes, and ears to connect and bond with Your people. I know that the only reason for hunger and poverty is because of sin. The speaker later said, “The hungry do not die because God did not care for them but because neither you or I gave them anything to eat.” I was left with WOW! Nut I still want to know why I have been blessed while others live in poverty and hunger? Lord help me to see and understand Your vision. I was left with these words the speaker said, “The poor are or desert.” I know I still have to process this a lot more.
Looking back on the activities from today, I know that I need to be gracious towards all people dealing with miscommunication and I need to be brave and bold. I should not fear being made a fool or stepping out in new ways. I should never just stand there and/or retreat to my comfort zone. I should and need to be bold because I have the Lord. Also today I really feel called to encouraged (by God and Sean) to be intentional with my relationship with Marie. I think it will be so easy for her to crawl inside herself and be an introvert. Also I want to encourage Sarah more and grow closer to her. We both have had little interaction with one another. I feel as though she can be discouraged and may feel on the outskirts at times. I feel overjoyed that the Lord has put these thoughts and desires in me and I have a desire to respond and I WILL!
On a more surface level, I killed my first cockroach. I think only 2 or 3 of us have done this. There is a contest for who can kill the most. I really want to talk to Phil about spiritual gifts; we started this talk back in April when I drove him home. I’m really amazed right now as we all journal before group time how we all have such a passion for God and his people in each of our own ways. I also can see that we each show it very differently at time and at other times similarly. God is good like that. “I’m in awe.”
I might loose this summer, loose according to me. I might be called to get my competitive side in check. God brought this to my thoughts when we had group time. We reflected and we prayed. This was a time to talk and apologize for thoughts, actions, and words. It was good to do this so that we were able to get things and thought off our chests and out of our minds. After words we went to bed. Adriel prayed for us. Yet NONE of us went to bed. We talked until about midnight.
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
Bangladesh Journal: Thursday June 22, 2006
Last night it was funny because at 1:30 am Lauren, Adriel and myself, all woke up and needed to pee. We then talked but none of us remembered what about. I got up at 5:40 am to take a shower when the water was running. There is only running water from 10pm until noon. After I showered and got read I got to lay down for a bit. (To go back a bit, at 1:30 am when I was peeing the longest pee of my life I remember thinking “WHAT AM I DOING HERE?”; at this point I really had no idea what I had gotten myself into). I thought about this as I was lying down. I know that God has called me here, but I don’t know exactly why. The rest of the girls got up at about 7 or 7:30 am.
As they were getting ready and I was playing catch up in the day before’s journal entry, I really connected with Lauren and Beth. I feel really blessed to feel that bond. We headed p to breakfast. I got to sit by Megan, Amanda, Dan and Zach. It was a lot of joking around. I also met Betsy, Sophia, and Julia who are all going on other Treks. It was cool to see how God called us or led us to pick our Trek. After breakfast, we went to worship. UI am really glad that this is a priority for I know we are here o do Orientation but we should rejoice in the Lord always and praise His name daily. After worship, we had assigned quiet time. This was really good because so often in my day I feel so busy that even in my quiet time I’m thinking about what I have to do, but what I have been getting ready for and organizing for (this trip) is finally happening and now I am really focused on being here and the people I am with.
From that point we went back to the meeting room for a talk. They guy who talked in name Jess. This mansion is actually the place he grew up in. He talked about how we normally just focus on our relationship with God and still it is very Christ-centered. He went further to day that God has intended to have our focus on each other and the world. This really hit me (I am still processing some of it) I know my personal relationship with the Lord has at most times been me-centered. I have been focusing on “Lord what is our will for ME” instead of seeing the LORD WILL. Also in serving other I tend to serve the ones I know and not anyone. I really need to continue to think and pray about this including my world connection. What am I doing in the world to stop social injustice? I know I fight it in conversation with my friends and family but that’s it. What does God want me to do? How far does He want me to go? I’m praying about all of this.
From there we had free time until lunch. At this pint I really got to talk with Lauren and Beth. I feel as though I can be open with the both of them. I can’t wait to see how God will use each one of us in the other’s lives. But I have to admit I am nervous for they are both in the same trek group, so I am afraid over the time we are apart I will get left out of the special bond. But I will trust God with this for He knows best and He has a plan for me. We then went to lunch and I just realized that I got the people I sat with at lunch and the people I sat with at breakfast confused, so I will just skip lunch because I already talked about it and I forgot what actually happened at breakfast.
After lunch we had action training. We had students that spoke other languages lead a group of 3 people. Our leader, Eddie, spoke Korean. He was suppose to make a picture out of 2-D shapes (that he was given) and then describe to us in Korean and using gestures how to make the same picture. It was difficult, but I never got frustrated, which was surprising. With the help of the group and picking up or recognizing the word triangle in Korean, I was able to duplicate his picture. It was really cool. We then split up into group time.
We talked about some happenings from our day and then split up into our smaller groups. My group members and I really all felt disconnected. I felt comfortable enough to share the reasons. I felt disconnected because: I had not spent any real time with time, Rachel and Danielle being mentor and mentoree and having that history, and me not feeling as though I have anyone from my past her like so many other members. Adriel expressed that she thinks it will all come with time, which I think is true. We just need to get to know the other people and how they work. Jess earlier in the day called people to talk about if they were feeling broken due to abuse, sexual impurity and a few other things. Nothing really his me until Danielle asked us about it in group. I have not gotten to share how I feel broken or how Doug’s relationship with me really effected how I trust people and my suspicions of them. Adriel shared about her family (I’m not going to write about it because I’m not sure if she is ok with that). This helped me to feel close to her and understand a little of how she works. Rachel shared about her family (same reason as above for not sharing). This very much gave me a huge insight to the way she works and feeling that much more connected to her. Danielle and I will share with the group later because we ran out of time.
We got back into the bigger group and discovered that for the rest of the day we would have a buddy (guy/girl). The guy (this time) is suppose to serve the girl, carry her things, open her doors, wait for her while she is in her room/going to the bathroom, and make her plate for dinner. This seemed very awkward to me. I’m very use to doing things for myself. But I really believe this is one way God is going to be working on me thins summer (my need to be in control). My partner was Andrew. I was excited for I hadn’t felt like I got to talk to him as much. It was really weird to have to tell him that I am going to the bathroom now or that I forgot something in my room. I felt as though I was being babysat or that I was accountable to someone. We have some free time before dinner, Phil, Beth, Andrew, and myself sat with our feet in the pool. Andrew and I talked about our families and us. We forgot to talk about our expectations for the other person. I might do that today. When I say expectations I mean for protection and everything that goes along that line. We also ate dinner together. There were these awesome fruits, I don’t know what they are called but you suck on the seed and the surrounding fruit. (I later discovered that they a lychee). Then Phil and Andrew had to bring chairs to the other meeting room so Sean had to “watch us”.
We went down stairs to get our stuff for our next meeting. At that meeting we got to hear from the IV Philippines leader and team, Missionaries that are going to Cambodia, and Scott Bessenecker, the father of the GUT (Global Urban Trek). It was almost impossible to stay awake and I ad to pee but I didn’t want to ask Andrew to go to the bathroom with me. But we got a break before Scott talked. That was good. Scott was awesome to hear talk. He talked about the purpose of the GUT and how every 40 years there is a radical movement of young adults going into missions. He also put a challenge on us or rather a thought of if we are called to missions. He prayed that if we were that God makes it clear and if we aren’t that we feel freedom. I haven’t felt either yet, but I’m excited to hear God’s will.
Ray cancelled team time; he and the other leaders felt that we needed to rest. This was true. The girls and I were escorted to our door and then got ready for bed. I LOVE OUR AIR CONDITIONER! We spent time talking and journaling until 11pm. I forgot to put this the other day but we have started to pray before we go to bed. I did it the first night and Lauren did it tonight. I feel blessed to live with these girls.
As they were getting ready and I was playing catch up in the day before’s journal entry, I really connected with Lauren and Beth. I feel really blessed to feel that bond. We headed p to breakfast. I got to sit by Megan, Amanda, Dan and Zach. It was a lot of joking around. I also met Betsy, Sophia, and Julia who are all going on other Treks. It was cool to see how God called us or led us to pick our Trek. After breakfast, we went to worship. UI am really glad that this is a priority for I know we are here o do Orientation but we should rejoice in the Lord always and praise His name daily. After worship, we had assigned quiet time. This was really good because so often in my day I feel so busy that even in my quiet time I’m thinking about what I have to do, but what I have been getting ready for and organizing for (this trip) is finally happening and now I am really focused on being here and the people I am with.
From that point we went back to the meeting room for a talk. They guy who talked in name Jess. This mansion is actually the place he grew up in. He talked about how we normally just focus on our relationship with God and still it is very Christ-centered. He went further to day that God has intended to have our focus on each other and the world. This really hit me (I am still processing some of it) I know my personal relationship with the Lord has at most times been me-centered. I have been focusing on “Lord what is our will for ME” instead of seeing the LORD WILL. Also in serving other I tend to serve the ones I know and not anyone. I really need to continue to think and pray about this including my world connection. What am I doing in the world to stop social injustice? I know I fight it in conversation with my friends and family but that’s it. What does God want me to do? How far does He want me to go? I’m praying about all of this.
From there we had free time until lunch. At this pint I really got to talk with Lauren and Beth. I feel as though I can be open with the both of them. I can’t wait to see how God will use each one of us in the other’s lives. But I have to admit I am nervous for they are both in the same trek group, so I am afraid over the time we are apart I will get left out of the special bond. But I will trust God with this for He knows best and He has a plan for me. We then went to lunch and I just realized that I got the people I sat with at lunch and the people I sat with at breakfast confused, so I will just skip lunch because I already talked about it and I forgot what actually happened at breakfast.
After lunch we had action training. We had students that spoke other languages lead a group of 3 people. Our leader, Eddie, spoke Korean. He was suppose to make a picture out of 2-D shapes (that he was given) and then describe to us in Korean and using gestures how to make the same picture. It was difficult, but I never got frustrated, which was surprising. With the help of the group and picking up or recognizing the word triangle in Korean, I was able to duplicate his picture. It was really cool. We then split up into group time.
We talked about some happenings from our day and then split up into our smaller groups. My group members and I really all felt disconnected. I felt comfortable enough to share the reasons. I felt disconnected because: I had not spent any real time with time, Rachel and Danielle being mentor and mentoree and having that history, and me not feeling as though I have anyone from my past her like so many other members. Adriel expressed that she thinks it will all come with time, which I think is true. We just need to get to know the other people and how they work. Jess earlier in the day called people to talk about if they were feeling broken due to abuse, sexual impurity and a few other things. Nothing really his me until Danielle asked us about it in group. I have not gotten to share how I feel broken or how Doug’s relationship with me really effected how I trust people and my suspicions of them. Adriel shared about her family (I’m not going to write about it because I’m not sure if she is ok with that). This helped me to feel close to her and understand a little of how she works. Rachel shared about her family (same reason as above for not sharing). This very much gave me a huge insight to the way she works and feeling that much more connected to her. Danielle and I will share with the group later because we ran out of time.
We got back into the bigger group and discovered that for the rest of the day we would have a buddy (guy/girl). The guy (this time) is suppose to serve the girl, carry her things, open her doors, wait for her while she is in her room/going to the bathroom, and make her plate for dinner. This seemed very awkward to me. I’m very use to doing things for myself. But I really believe this is one way God is going to be working on me thins summer (my need to be in control). My partner was Andrew. I was excited for I hadn’t felt like I got to talk to him as much. It was really weird to have to tell him that I am going to the bathroom now or that I forgot something in my room. I felt as though I was being babysat or that I was accountable to someone. We have some free time before dinner, Phil, Beth, Andrew, and myself sat with our feet in the pool. Andrew and I talked about our families and us. We forgot to talk about our expectations for the other person. I might do that today. When I say expectations I mean for protection and everything that goes along that line. We also ate dinner together. There were these awesome fruits, I don’t know what they are called but you suck on the seed and the surrounding fruit. (I later discovered that they a lychee). Then Phil and Andrew had to bring chairs to the other meeting room so Sean had to “watch us”.
We went down stairs to get our stuff for our next meeting. At that meeting we got to hear from the IV Philippines leader and team, Missionaries that are going to Cambodia, and Scott Bessenecker, the father of the GUT (Global Urban Trek). It was almost impossible to stay awake and I ad to pee but I didn’t want to ask Andrew to go to the bathroom with me. But we got a break before Scott talked. That was good. Scott was awesome to hear talk. He talked about the purpose of the GUT and how every 40 years there is a radical movement of young adults going into missions. He also put a challenge on us or rather a thought of if we are called to missions. He prayed that if we were that God makes it clear and if we aren’t that we feel freedom. I haven’t felt either yet, but I’m excited to hear God’s will.
Ray cancelled team time; he and the other leaders felt that we needed to rest. This was true. The girls and I were escorted to our door and then got ready for bed. I LOVE OUR AIR CONDITIONER! We spent time talking and journaling until 11pm. I forgot to put this the other day but we have started to pray before we go to bed. I did it the first night and Lauren did it tonight. I feel blessed to live with these girls.
Bangladesh Journal: Monday June 19, 2006-Wednesday June 21, 2006
I have been almost non-stop traveling since Monday at 4:30 am. My flight from O’Hare to LAX was good; I slept most of the time. Or rather I tried to. When I got to LAX, I felt a little unsure about what to do and where to go. LAX is a beautiful airport. There are little boutique type places inside. Once I got my bags I called my family and the LAX point person (Bo) who I think I woke up. I then wandered around the American Airlines terminal until I found someone and asked him where the International terminal was. I got to walk outside from one terminal to the next. I breathed in CA air and saw some palm trees. I can officially say I have walked in CA now. I wandered around the International terminal, just to check it out. I then settled at a table in the upstairs sitting/waiting/dining area. I found different ways to amuse myself a.k.a. sudoku, playing cards, reading a magazine and a book, and just people watching. Close to lunch the place got really busy and I needed to o to the bathroom, but I was afraid to loose my table. God provided me with a person who asked if she could sit with me. She was also willing to save the table as I went to get food and to the bathroom. Both of these tasks were rather interesting since I got a cart for my bags and I took that everywhere. The food I got (for both lunch and dinner) was almost like Panda Express but more authentic.
After she left I just chilled more and worked on my prayer journal and calendar. It was really amazing to see how God really led me to write certain prayer requests down for specific people, when I never really thought about praying for that person in that way. Praise the Lord. The seating area died down a bit so I went to the bathroom and explored the upstairs. My table was taken when I got back but there was one open closer to the window. I then table hopped for a while till I was sitting at a table that was by the window and a plug but not in direct sunlight thus making it extremely hot. I got to talk to Brad Drewes. It was great to talk to him. He gave me some praise (from himself). He is getting married (YAY)!
Finally at around 6pm other people started to arrive in this order: Kyle, Caleb, Andrew, Lauren, Marie, Adriel, and Phil. These were the ones who arrived before 10. We played some card games, which made the time go by faster. Finally we went to go check in and go to the gate. We then met Dan; he had already checked his bad. Beth arrived right before we boarded the plane. I really enjoyed getting to know everyone. We then took a bus to get to the plane. That is when I started to feel unbelievably tired. I had some good conversation with Andrew about where I have traveled before and my goal of swimming in every ocean and visiting every continent with the exception of Antarctica. We then boarded the 747. All of our seats for the most part were scattered. I was a little glad about this because then I would not be tempted to talk or stay awake.
So I slept for 10 hours of the 13 hours flight. Waking up only for meals, bathroom breaks, and the last Movie (Last Holiday). When I was awake it was good t see some familiar faces and to talk with the people I am going to spend 7 weeks with. When we finally landed in Taipei, I was ready to go and very awake. It was 6 am there but 3 am in LA and 5 am at home (so there was a 13 hr difference). At the airport we played “Evil Dictator” which was so much fun. It’s a game where you make up rules that no one knows about (only the ruler does) so people get penalties until they follow the rules. During this time I got to know people from other Asia Treks and Kyle, who also played.
It was fun to just talk to people. I sat by Dan and Kyle on the way to Manila. We listened to Jazz on the plane and talked. When we finally got there, I was hit by a wave of heat. The smells were totally different there. The air is more humid and it just felt wet. We then went to an area where we were going to meet our ride. We put our luggage on a truck and then we boarded a nice bus. We finally connected with the rest of our student group (Rachel, Sarah, Zach, and Sean). It was great to see everyone. We then drove through Manila for 45 minutes till we reached Quizon City where we were staying.
It was amazing to see the city. Manila had a lot of modern and English billboards. I found out that movies come out on Wednesday. Also gas prices are about the same. It was amazing to see how certain areas were really clean but still looked unclean or old. Every building was so close to the next. They almost looked like one long building. When we arrived at the mansion, I noticed that all the houses had brick walls around them with barbed wise and broken glass cemented to the top. The place we were staying had a textile factory up front. I am not sure if the factory is still in use but it is still there.
When we walked up the driveway we got t o see our trek leaders (Ray, Danielle, Megan, Amanda, Ling, Darren, and John). We then got to have lunch not that we hadn’t eaten on the plane. The main meal was pork so I ate the sides. The backyard was amazing. The porch is stone and has columns. There is a pool and a performance stage made out of bamboo. They had set up tables on the back lawn and on the porch where we could eat. After we ate we got our room assignments. I was staying with 4 other girls who are going to Dhaka (Marie, Beth, Lauren, and Adriel). We share 1 double bed and 1 Queen. It’s kind of fun. We have been spoiled for everyone had an Air Conditioning unit in their room, not you are suppose to only have it on at night. The rooms are not what I expected. The only way I can explain it is a really nice hotel that needs A LOT of repairs, but imagine that it is a hotel from the 80s.
After we got settled a bit, we had team time. We talked about what our expectations were and where we were. We then ate dinner. (It is a little hard to remember because of the jet lag). We then went to group time (all Asian Treks). They knew better than to do something important because we were so far gone. Before our leaders would let us go to bed they made us play mafia, missionary style. That was draining. We then fought to stay awake until 10pm their time 9am my home time.
After she left I just chilled more and worked on my prayer journal and calendar. It was really amazing to see how God really led me to write certain prayer requests down for specific people, when I never really thought about praying for that person in that way. Praise the Lord. The seating area died down a bit so I went to the bathroom and explored the upstairs. My table was taken when I got back but there was one open closer to the window. I then table hopped for a while till I was sitting at a table that was by the window and a plug but not in direct sunlight thus making it extremely hot. I got to talk to Brad Drewes. It was great to talk to him. He gave me some praise (from himself). He is getting married (YAY)!
Finally at around 6pm other people started to arrive in this order: Kyle, Caleb, Andrew, Lauren, Marie, Adriel, and Phil. These were the ones who arrived before 10. We played some card games, which made the time go by faster. Finally we went to go check in and go to the gate. We then met Dan; he had already checked his bad. Beth arrived right before we boarded the plane. I really enjoyed getting to know everyone. We then took a bus to get to the plane. That is when I started to feel unbelievably tired. I had some good conversation with Andrew about where I have traveled before and my goal of swimming in every ocean and visiting every continent with the exception of Antarctica. We then boarded the 747. All of our seats for the most part were scattered. I was a little glad about this because then I would not be tempted to talk or stay awake.
So I slept for 10 hours of the 13 hours flight. Waking up only for meals, bathroom breaks, and the last Movie (Last Holiday). When I was awake it was good t see some familiar faces and to talk with the people I am going to spend 7 weeks with. When we finally landed in Taipei, I was ready to go and very awake. It was 6 am there but 3 am in LA and 5 am at home (so there was a 13 hr difference). At the airport we played “Evil Dictator” which was so much fun. It’s a game where you make up rules that no one knows about (only the ruler does) so people get penalties until they follow the rules. During this time I got to know people from other Asia Treks and Kyle, who also played.
It was fun to just talk to people. I sat by Dan and Kyle on the way to Manila. We listened to Jazz on the plane and talked. When we finally got there, I was hit by a wave of heat. The smells were totally different there. The air is more humid and it just felt wet. We then went to an area where we were going to meet our ride. We put our luggage on a truck and then we boarded a nice bus. We finally connected with the rest of our student group (Rachel, Sarah, Zach, and Sean). It was great to see everyone. We then drove through Manila for 45 minutes till we reached Quizon City where we were staying.
It was amazing to see the city. Manila had a lot of modern and English billboards. I found out that movies come out on Wednesday. Also gas prices are about the same. It was amazing to see how certain areas were really clean but still looked unclean or old. Every building was so close to the next. They almost looked like one long building. When we arrived at the mansion, I noticed that all the houses had brick walls around them with barbed wise and broken glass cemented to the top. The place we were staying had a textile factory up front. I am not sure if the factory is still in use but it is still there.
When we walked up the driveway we got t o see our trek leaders (Ray, Danielle, Megan, Amanda, Ling, Darren, and John). We then got to have lunch not that we hadn’t eaten on the plane. The main meal was pork so I ate the sides. The backyard was amazing. The porch is stone and has columns. There is a pool and a performance stage made out of bamboo. They had set up tables on the back lawn and on the porch where we could eat. After we ate we got our room assignments. I was staying with 4 other girls who are going to Dhaka (Marie, Beth, Lauren, and Adriel). We share 1 double bed and 1 Queen. It’s kind of fun. We have been spoiled for everyone had an Air Conditioning unit in their room, not you are suppose to only have it on at night. The rooms are not what I expected. The only way I can explain it is a really nice hotel that needs A LOT of repairs, but imagine that it is a hotel from the 80s.
After we got settled a bit, we had team time. We talked about what our expectations were and where we were. We then ate dinner. (It is a little hard to remember because of the jet lag). We then went to group time (all Asian Treks). They knew better than to do something important because we were so far gone. Before our leaders would let us go to bed they made us play mafia, missionary style. That was draining. We then fought to stay awake until 10pm their time 9am my home time.
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